who else feels like they will be alone forever?

Did any of you ever try dating sites? Just wondering because I met Gijs through a dating site.

And did anyone notice the ad on this topic? It's an ad for a dating site for Thai women. Is that on purpose or coincidental?

Also wondering if anyone is tempted by that ad actually.

I got a solar power ad...lol

I di try a dating website once, but I kept getting creepy guys asking me for sex or threesomes, and I was like ewwww.

I have ad-blocker - bwahaha!

I haven't tried dating websites but have met most of my boyfriends online, to be honest. It works nicely for me because I'm not attractive enough for guys to just come up and talk to me.

Yeah I've realised I do the alienating thing as well. I'm just hoping I don't push my current boyfriend away. Unfortunately one of my nervous breakdowns has shown up now, and we've only known each other a month so it's not like I can bother him with it, but I feel like I should tell him so he doesn't think I'm just being horrible..? Right now I just constantly want to be both on my own and really, really not on my own. Like I'm terrified of being on my own (I mean in a literal sense - sitting in my room alone doing work etc) but I'm also terrified of human interaction. Ah well, no uni next week, I can try and sort myself out then!

I think you should be honest, and it took me ages to learn to love myself. You can't be in a loving relationship till u love yourself. I am 28 and it too me a long time to get the self esteem. Surround yourself with postive people, and don't call urself ugly. Everyone is beautiful, just because you don't fit into society's neich, doesn't make you ugly

you might also want to consider theraphy, I did it, it helped me. It might not help you, but maybe even getting your fears out here, helps

Knittin' Nitten: You're soooo not ugly!! Michelle is right, putting yourself down is only going to make you feel worse. I'm one to talk but it sounds like we all have problems with esteem and with alienating people. I think you are right to tell him, just to explain why you might act in certain ways.

we have to get over our own hurdles...but we have each other. and it helps me

It does always help to have a group of people supporting you! ^.^ And having a big group of beautiful ladies to help each other out - who could ask for anything better, right? =)

Bec: Definately tell your non-virginal friends to stuff it when they say it isn't a big deal - it is!!! I always planned to save myself for marriage, but with my current boyfriend who was my first love, I changed my mind! I didn't want to look back one day and feel like I had missed out on something great, and he was really good about it! I was surprised, but really quite pleased when he turned me down! He refused for a good month, because he wanted to make absolutely sure that I was ready and that it was something I wouldn't regret. I think that's so special for a guy to do that, because most, once getting the go ahead, would just go for it! The first time is something you can never get back, so good for you! Waiting for that special someone - definately nothing wrong with that. ^.^

Heh. As for dating sites, I know my boyfriend went on one for fun when he was single - he filled out the profile and it said it couldn't help him! He was incompatible with everyone I guess. HAHA! I've never let him live that one down!

Unfortunately, I know in the long run it's not going to work out for us.... different little things that would be a major pain down the road, but it's fun for now, and I love him to death! I think my problem is similar to Michelle's.... when I was 11, I met this guy, Colby, from Alabama. We would talk on the phone for hours and hours, and he was my best friend!! We only get to see each other once a year, but I've never felt with anyone the way I feel around him. It's like I can get through anything as long as he's beside me, and it sounds so cliche, but it's like I love his soul and my heart just sings when I'm around him. I love it! Unfortunately, I guess because we're so far apart, we've never really had the chance to test the waters, and it would seem that he doesn't quite feel the same, which is okay!! I would much rather keep him as a very close friend than push for more just to put a title on the relationship. Still, I'm 20 now, and I have yet to meet another who makes me feel that way!! Ah well.... ^.^

I know I'm only 14 but it kinda feels that way for me, too. The only "boyfriends" I've had haven't been very good; the first one was a loser and the second was too shy. And the guy I've liked on and off since 3rd grade has never even given me a chance, or even thought about me that way. I know for a fact he doesn't like me now - he likes 2 of my friends and some other girl. No guys think I'm pretty...some stupid boy in my class made a "list" and it got out...I really know I shouldn't care and just be mad that he even did that and I am but I can't help being hurt by that.

And really all guys outside of school who I might consider striking up a friendship with ask me if I know its not Halloween.

Omigosh, that's really rude on two accounts:

> The -making the list-
> The -"you know it's not Halloween" comment-

It still sickens me about how rude and ignorant people can be. Just because we are all different from what society class as the "norm" means that anyone outside this catagory are allowed to be mocked at. It's like we are the one's not taken seriously even though we are probably the ones that are more down to earth!!

It's like we all have feelings, same as every other person, so why do people think they have a right to destroy that?
I'm sorry but stories like these really wind me up!!

Anyways, I'm not kinda bothered if I am alone forever, it's just when others kinda pressure you into settling down... so long as I am happy and confident in myself and have fantastic friends around me... then I'm all good. But I don't have that right now. :S

Ok, Courtney... Just to make something perfectly clear to you. Guys are not that bright at 14 years of age (and quite a few of us not even later in life apparently)... I should know. We really don't have the tools to express ourselves at that age, nor are most of us comfortable enough with ourselves to do so with perfect honesty. Again, I've been there. I know... Hell, I made some (and by some I mean a lot of) mistakes out of pure peer pressure that I regret to this day when I was younger.

Luckily some of us do grow up eventually and turn out nice enough... Not saying I did or anything, but I've seen it happen.

What I'm saying is, that it's not really a sign of the future to come if you haven't had a good boyfriend at 14. It might not seem like it right now, but trust me. Relationships do get a whole lot better when the whole high school drama gets taken out of the picture.

Haha yeah Courtney, I used to get that Halloween comment all the time. I'd either respond with "Oh...isn't it? *confused look around*" or "Everyday's Halloween for me!", depending on how confident I was feeling.

Bleh, Andy started telling me about all the one night stands he's had the other night and I started panicking =( Andy was the first time I've ever slept with someone I've met that day, and it turned into a relationship. So now I'm worrying that this means he'll either cheat on me or just get bored of me really quickly and find someone else =( hate feeling like this. He's just way too good for me.

And yeah, high school drama is good to get out of the way - unfortunately it doesn't get any better at uni (college for Americans?), but I'm holding out hope

you know what, your to good for him, maybe in a way he is trying to make you jealous or something. Tell him like it is, if you want a healthly relationship you need to communicate.

I broke off my engagement because my bf whould just not tell me what was on his mind, u can tell when there is something wrong, so just say it. I always tell it like it is.

Kitten don't worry yourself about him, you need to ask yourself does he make you happy? Can you see yourself with him long term or are you with him because you don't want to be alone?

I've always had a problem with NOT wanting to date anyone. I've had guys actually try to convince me to date them...b/c I honestly wasn't interested. I liked the freedom and I think I feared the closeness. I didn't want to open up and give them my all...just to end up disappointed. I knew at a very young age that my very first relationship wouldn't last forever and I also made up my mind not to have sex until I was out of highschool. I lost my virginity at 19yrs old...and it was 4 months into the relationship. I think that I was just so anxious to get rid of it and when I did...I felt dumb. I guess some ppl are lucky and have that magical emotional first time, but that's prob just 15% of women. The rest of us are left confused and disappointed.
So, I think I just had a negative attitude toward men without really giving them a chance. Some of them WILL dissappoint you, but I look at it as a learning experience. You know what to look for in the next relationship. And eventually you'll come across someone that just changes everything.

I agree Kira, I was lucky, my first relationship was great. But alot of girls believe in the fairytale, love at first site and true love forever. But sometimes it just doesn't happen