Eloping

Me and my fiance want to get married on sptember 26th 2010 at our local courthouse. So much stuff will be happening around us: I'll be 18 that august 2010 he will be 18 in february 2010 and we will both be starting college in the fall of 2010.
We have been researching and found that after marriage we must begin paying taxes as adults however we will be students and i thought students didn't pay taxes. There is no one we can go to without our parents finding out except for the internet and his textbooks (he is studying law)

Does anyone have any info or advice? Any little thing will really help. If we can't figure anything out by august one of two things can happen: comming out to our parents or settling for a mock wedding and postponing the real thing.

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23 replies since 9th January 2010 • Last reply 9th January 2010

Reply #1:

What's the rush?

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Reply #2:

well where are you living? and yes one you reach legal age, you have to pay taxes. Job or no job.

and why don`t you want your parents to know? I think you need to be honest and tell your parents your plans.

You may also want to wait untill you finish college, because one yes you have to pay taxes(together), pay rent, food, tution, you may have to get a part time job.

and do you want to run the risk of your parents kicking you out? Be truthful, talk to your parents.

Also to elope, you need two wittness and you have to appy for a marriage liscence(30 days before you elope) you need to make an appoitment with the justise of peace, and depending on where you live, you may have to take marrige classes before you get eloped.



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Reply #3:

Michelle says it all. Happy

You don't have to be married to be together in love.

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Reply #4:

I live in georgia and we have money put away for the licence and we have our witnesses, his mom kinda hints at knowing and if she does she isn't upset at all but we would rather break the news closer to the date if possible

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Reply #5:

I think you should do it now, you may need help planning this. and are your witnesses of legal age? Also you need to meet with the J.O.P before you elope.

and yes, you will have to pay taxes

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Reply #6:

http://marriage.about.com/cs/marriagelicenses/p/georgia.htm

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Reply #7:

Why are you getting married? You are only 18!

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Reply #8:

Yeah, I was 21 when I got married, I'm 25 now, and divorced. My ex and I separated 2 years ago, next month, and finally got our divorce finalized last month. I'm not trying to boss you around, but you have so much life to live, it would be so much better for you both to wait. You could get an apartment together, and see how well that works. In this world, you do NOT have to be married to be committed. I thought I had to marry my ex because we were sleeping together, and everyone was pressuring us not to. You can't know that the two of you will work well together until you go through some grown up issues together, like paying bills, dealing with school/not seeing each other all the time. Are you being pressured? It's scaring the rest of us that you are so keen on getting married in secret. Do you have very strict parents?

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Reply #9:

Tiger Lily is right, getting married isn't a easy matter, its going to be hard. You both going to school, but then you will have to get jobs to pay rent, bills, food.

and yes it is the getting married in secret that bothers us. Marrige is a very important step, I have been engaged twice and both times, I broke it off. I will be 30 in june. There is no rush, take your time.

plus, before you get marriedyou really should live with your boyfriend for a year, to see if you are compatible. Being with someone and living with them, totally different.

And what happens if you get pregnat? You may have to leave school?

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Reply #10:

Wait. please. Nothing wrong with a long engagement?

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Reply #11:

I totally agree with what everyone is saying here. And I'll give you the same advice as I'd give my sister......Please don't go through with it at the moment, especially without talking it through with your parents first. When I was your age I was madly in love with this guy, we had been together for 2 yrs and I wanted so badly to get married. Thankfully we broke up because looking back now, I realise that marrying him would have been the worst thing I could have ever done. If I had married him, it's very likely that I would not have met my future husband Mike, who is the best man any woman could aks for. If you guys are meant to be together then waiting a year or two isn't going to make a difference. And like some of the girls have mentioned before me, live together for at least a year first, make sure you are really compatible before taking such a big step. Anyway, in whatever you choose to do, I wish you all the best........

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Reply #12:

remember we are not telling you not to, but just think about it more.

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Reply #13:

Right, guys. We are just loving you, and showing you that you have many choices. Honestly, once you move out of your parents house into your own place, with a job...You'll realize all the things you can do, and not have to get permission anymore. You get to make mistakes and learn from them. That's what this time of your life is for, learning who you are today, and who you want to be, tomorrow. I live in the south, too, and I know how much pressure is put on girls to get married, and not 'live in sin'. I've lived with my fiance for over a year now, and we know more about each other and ourselves, than my ex husband and I ever learned in our time together. Your guy may be wonderful, but he can be wonderful without already being your husband. Something I've learned from a lot of my girlfriends, being engaged does not mean you will get married. It just means you are committed to each other, and want to find out if you could be happy married to each other. And living together feels a lot less....I guess constrained? Than marriage. You don't feel like you have to suck it up and get over all the crap you end up not liking, because you HAVE to stay together. If something happens to change one of your minds about staying together, you can just break up. Believe me, living together is a LOT cheaper than getting a divorce! Happy

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Reply #14:

oh it is, much cheaper.

but like tiger lily said, once you move out on your own you will find out what its like, and you may change your mind or not. What we are saying is live with him a bit, and then see how you feel

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