MEN!

yeah, i will
but i guess hes really sicks, he hasnt been here all week

men!!!!!!!! they drive me crazy. Just keep your promises

UGH! alright ranting about x's now. X boyfriend number 1. I've liked him since I was 12 at the boys and girls club, then when I was 14, my best friend turned out to be FRIENDS with him, and we found this out when we went to see a movie [I was going with her and her friends] and... its him. That day, after the movie, he asked me out. We never saw eachother. Once a month or maybe twice. He was grounded, I was grounded, we talked on aim tons, and on Myspace. He was really funny, and sweet, and smart. He made me feel wanted. We broke up though [him with me], not because we didn't like eachother, but because we never saw eachother. A year or two later, he asked me out again, same thing happened, I broke up with him this time. Again, we still liked eachother, but we never saw eachother. So this past year... because I'm an idiot, we started hanging out, and we saw eachother often, so we got BACK TOGETHER. I was extremely reluctant, but... I felt like he could be the one. I always thought that I could fall in love with him. My fantasies... always about him. My dreams.. him, it was always him him him. Even between our "spats" of relationships, when i was dating another guy, I thought about HIM. Number 1. After we got together... we hung out more... but... I was so worries. When we saw eachother... we are so attracted to eachother that we just did.. physical things. I've never had sex, and we didn't do oral because I wasn't ready. I was to young. But we would make out until he had to go... just so much sexual tension. He was grounded, and we would see eachother when he said he was "excersizing", so we couldn't talk on aim or myspace. And I'm ALWAYS afraid to be the "nagging" girlfriend, so I never would say anything. I'd never ask why he didn't call, or why we never talked. I brought it up once, but.. he is so eloquent, and when I talk to him, I stumble over my words and I mess up and I'm so lightheaded... its crazy. So I ended up telling him that I wasn't comfertable with him sexually because I felt I really didn't know him. We talked on aim, and we've made out... but we haven't talked a lot in person. I don't know HIM, and I didn't feel like he knew me. We've KNOWN eachother for 5 years... but I didn't think he understood who I was. We talked a little more when we hung out... And then someone "truth boxes" him [myspace application] saying that I am cheating on him with the writer of the message, and that i feel horrible about it, but the writer loves it. I have NEVER cheated on anyone. I haven't even thought about it. Especially HIM. I fantasized about HIM when I was with other guys, AND when I was with him. There was no one else. So I called him up and told him this. he said he believed me, but that the message got him thinking about how our relationship wasn't working because WE NEVER TALKED. THE THING I WAS NAGGING HIM ABOUT DOING. THE THING I WANTED TO DO MORE... we didn't do enough of it... he broke up with me. I'm still incredibly attracted to him, especially when I hang out with his friends [who are my friends as well, but they are closer with him] because I get to see who i was missing. But I also realize... we've tried 3 times... there is NOT A CHANCE IN HELL that its happening again. So I go to a mutual friends party saturday, he was there, I didn't feel awkward. Not one bit. I liked seeing him as a friend. He was a good boyfriend, but he is a great friend. but apparently, according to my friends, he was hitting on me and he still liked me. Which just... it infuriated me. I could explain it so much better, but this is already so long... it just. I felt so much for this guy.... I've put everything I had into him, all my hope, my faith, trust, extreme emotions, and I was rejected. I got up, I moved on, and I dealed. I got above it... and now... he's trying to suck me back in? Haven't I been through enough with this guy? I just... I want to have OTHER FAILED RELATIONSHIP... not the same one over and over. I can't keep learning the same lesson over and over, taking pieces of me away each time. ugh.. why are boys so confusing?!

You just know when it's right. It sounds like you've already made your decision, find someone new, you're strong

*nods* I've gone through similar things, and you just have to stand your ground and stay focused on what will make YOU happy.

On another note, my bf punched me in my sleep this morning. He was asleep, too. Apparently he had a dream where his brother really pissed him off... so much so that he made a punching motion in real life. It didn't hurt much, but it really startled me.

he forgot me

Ugh. I think thats the only real world that sums it all up. The hopelessness and the frustration, the giving up but the being strong, everything.


Just...


ugh.

yup, agreed

please please i hope he'll stop liking me i dont want to have to hurt his feelings :

awww



you might have to, he didn't get the hint?

My husband is an idiot and that's all I can say.....

I have no luck with men! I'm pushing 31 and I'm convinced I'll never get married! I always end up dating alcoholics and I don't drink anymore!

Men are stupid. And you will find him. If you moved to Vegas..... Just kidding. No he's out there somewhere. I was with alot of losers before I married Jesse. And while he is an IDIOT!

OOOPs Pressed the wrong button.

....and while he is an IDIOT, he is still an awsome husband. Except for when he is an IDIOT!

I'm supposed to call an ex from about 12 years ago to go out for lunch. I was impressed that he asked me out for lunch and not for drinks. It seems like every guy in Knoxville is a drunk! He's a Marine, or he used to be . . .