Awkward E-Mail

I'll just make my long story short.


My boyfriend's brother was my best friend in high school and he married a girl I never really thought was right for him but she was really nice to me when my boyfriend and I were going through a rough patch in our relationship and took a break from each other.

Now my boyfriend's brother is thinking about getting a divorce and has seperated from his wife (less than 2 years into their marriage) and he is trying to see if they will be able to work things out. Last week she blocked me from seeing her wall on facebook and I don't know what that's about but I want to send her a message letting her know that I'm here for her because my boyfriend's family can be very over-bearing and if they find out that the two of them are seperating they will come down really hard on her. (They still don't accept me as part of the family even though my boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years and most of them won't even add me as a friend on facebook). I know that if her and her husband are going to make things work the last thing she needs is to feel alienated from his family and friends.

I really don't even know how to start to tell her that I'm here for her without sounding like I'm in her business or anything. Anyone have any advice on how to breach this delicate topic?

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5 replies since 20th June 2011 • Last reply 20th June 2011

Reply #1:

oh man....I am soooo lost, lol. I tried to read it twice. My brain hurts *_* Sorry i couldnt help Happy

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Reply #2:

I'll try to simplify it- sorry, I just didn't want to give out names if I could help it.

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Reply #3:

ohhhh. this makes a lot more sence now. I guess what I would do is to email her and let her know just what you were saying with knowing how the guys family is. Try and be very neutral and extra nice. As long as you do that I dont see why she would have a reason to get mad at you. And the great thing about email is you always have a copy if she deceieds to say you were rude to her.

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Reply #4:

I agree with Pam, email her. Genuinely tell her that you are there for her. I think the fact that you want to reach out to her is a kind gesture and that in itself speaks volumes about who you are. On a personal note, I hate facebook...they locked me out of my account and I don't know why.

Why would your boyfriends family not add you on Facebook? What is the big deal?

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Reply #5:

Oh because they think I'm a passing wind that will eventually go away. My boyfriend and I have been together for a long time and he hasn't proposed marriage. His grandma told me straight out last Christmas that he'll never marry me. But in a couple of years he might find a nice girl to settle down with. That's his dad's side of the family- they aren't easy to deal with. His mom loves me and already considers me a daughter. Not only are her and I fb friends but she's listed me as her daughter on there. I'm the one who is blamed for the break in our relationship a couple years ago because I was the one who technically left. But the only ones in the family who know what happened are my boyfriend's mom and brother.

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