Should I hate my life?

hey guys, feeling a bit down. Its winter, my depression is getting on me. Trying to keep face for my bf who is having a rough patch at work.

just wondering if I can do better in my life, I mean I am 27 years old, flunked out of university and has a diploma in Graphic Design[only to have graduated 6 months ago-and not been able to get a job] Now I think I really don't even want to do that.

I really don't know what to do.

I work part time at a department store- its getting harder because of my illness. I don't want to talk or help people because I am feeling so off. Its like I want to be alone. This is also one of the reasons I find it hard to get and keep a job. I often quit because I start to feel bored.

That I guess would be my ADD kicking in.

AND I owe money on Student loans, paying them off. Still feeling like a looser because I never finished my degree. My BF has THREE. He has a career. I have a crappy job.


Right now[this season] its hard, I'm feeling low, my body is feeling it. I am tired and I feel like a don't give a sh*te. Sigh.

I don't know if I should try going back to school, I don't have the money. and by the time I would finish, I would be in my 30's.

I feel like I am a sucky graphic designer, an overlooked photographer, a very hasseled salesperson with crappy skin due to the weather.

I also feel like I just can't get ahead. Its either I am too qualified, or not enough.

theres my sad rant of the night

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17 replies since 27th November 2008 • Last reply 27th November 2008

Reply #1:

aww no you shouldn't Michelle!! we love you here!!

you're an amazing person and you don't need any stupid DEGREE to prove it. i can tell how awesome you are just by this board!! doesn't that mean something? you're amazing, we all think you're amazing!!!! it'll get better, i promise!!

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Reply #2:

Oh Michelle don´t think like that.. You are a nice and awesome Person. Like Courtney said.. you don´t have to proof anything..
I´m unable to work right now..cause I´m ill and I started to get depressed too.
I had to break up my University but sometimes you need time to go on.
I feel so much better now and in 4Month I will be okay after a operation of both of my knees and can go back and finish my university..

At the End I will be 30years too.. But my BF helps me a lot and I don´t see lot of other persons yet.Cause I just don´t know what to talk about..
I cant tell about my job or some other stuff..because I can´t walk a lot and I can´t do a lot of party.
And I feel like I bother other people with my illness...

It helps if you make something which you can be proud of.. Like your own Etsy shop.. You just have to start a little Project or something and when you feel better then you have to start bigger Projects ;)

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Reply #3:

thanks guys... its just that I don't know what I really want to do. Well I guess I do, but it might seem silly. I just want to be a mom and work part time. I want to provide a good home for my bf

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Reply #4:

aww michelle your bf loves you no matter what!! you'll be able to!

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Reply #5:

^^ You can do it.. Maybe you have to talk about kids and all that stuff to see what he thinks about that.. Beeing a mom is a really good job I think...
Some people want to make career and others only want to be moms..
Beeing a good mom is more difficult and more work then just a normal job..
It´s a job which never ends ;) *g*
You both have to think about that.. and I know you will be a very good mom ^^*hughs*

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Reply #6:

*hugs for Michelle*

My mum didn't get a job for a whole year after she finished her degree, but then she found one that was just right for her so it was worth the long wait. It just takes time for a job to come around and for you to think "Yes, that's the job I want!". I'm sure you'll find the right job eventually.
If you decide you don't want to do graphic design anymore, maybe you could do another course to train in some other skill? Something connected to graphic design maybe, because then you'll already have knowledge related to the subject and that'll look good to employers Happy. Lik an evening course or something, because then it's something else to do so you're not just sitting around at home, and you can keep working so you've got some money coming in, and you won't have to give up spending time with your boyfriend either.
Just keep at it and don't give up, it probably seems difficult now but you'll get where you want to be in the end.

Oohh, your bag and goodies are nearly finished btw! I feel terrible for taking so long with this, I've just had so much going on recently, it's been crazy. Thank you for being so patient! Happy

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Reply #7:

yeah!!!!Woot! Bag!!!almost done...

well I am feeling better, I guess it was just a bad week

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Reply #8:

Awww!!

Winter is always hard!

Michelle you are beautiful!! Don't you dare go thinking you are anything other than that.

Maybe you need to write down ideas...on what you want to do...and then weigh them out?

You will be okay...whenever it seems like things are getting terrible..things always get better...i've found that usually bad things happen all at once and good things happen all at once....MOST OF THE TIME...so you just gotta keep your chin up during the bad times...it'll be okay! :-D

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Reply #9:

Awww I hope you are feeling better sweetheart, you're an amazing, gorgeous, talented girl and you shouldn't think any less than that about yourself!

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Reply #10:

Happy thanks guys!

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Reply #11:

Alot of the times I feel like I failed at things too.I am 32 years old.I live in a rental home, not my own and I work in the construction end of things,drywall,steel stud,insulation,warehouse work.Though I do make good money at it it's not my dream job.I never went to university or college and though sometimes I am saddened about my lack of education due to financial reasons I always try and find the good points to my job or what have you.A department store is not a bad place to work either.I have worked retail and it can be alot of fun sometimes.My friend is 32 and he finally got excepted into a college for graphic design.Always remember "it's never to late to learn".

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Reply #12:

thanks Sun. Thanks everyone

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Reply #13:

Michele, you're to awesome to have to hate you're life. You make me smile with you're crafts, and words of encouragment, and you're awesome video's on the Challenge page Happy

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Reply #14:

thanks Jas

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